cjmills[dot]me | A Blog By CJ Mills

Andy is in town this week, which is always fun. Every time we get together we always talk about the various entrepreneurial leaps we should have made over the years. Mostly minor stuff, but stuff that would have been fun to see where it/they could go.

Today, as I drove into work, I thought about some of the risks I’ve taken over the years and how they’ve paid off. Sure I’ve made some bad decisions in my lifetime, but I’ve never been afraid to step out and jump. I quickly made a connection to my little guy, who is on the brink of walking. I know its a very basic connection, but at the core of it all – he is learning to take one of the first major risks in his lifetime. Its interesting to watch him battle through it…to watch the determination on his face, and the utter excitement and joy he gets when we cheer him on.

And much like now as he manages a few steps only to fall again, I know he’ll take a few risks in his lifetime that don’t pan out – but just like he is doing now, I pray he’s learned enough to know how to pick himself up and start walking all over again.

Today was one of those days that, as a parent, I just wanted to throw in the towel. Asher would not stop crying, Jadyn would not stop asking questions, the dog got in the way of everything, and I racked myself in the junk trying to do help my wife and sweep the floor (I know, crazy, right?).

I think we are all supposed to have those days on occasion. They help put things into perspective and help us grow a bit. They make me realize that even when I think I’ve had a hard day at work, I know my wife’s was probably harder. They make me realize how great my parents had to have been to put up with me and my little brother and sister.

They make me think.

So no, I’m not really throwing in the towel, or figuring out how I can leave my kids at my parents house without them knowing. But I am thinking….

growing….

learning….

That’s better than giving up all together, right?

Below is an email I received from Asher (Andrea posing as Asher) while on my NY trip this week. I love my wife and how creative she can be. This was a much needed break from an otherwise CRAZY schedule in the hustle and bustle of the city. Enjoy a good look into “Asher’s World”….

Daddy,

I had quite the morning this morning, and I just wanted to tell you all about it. First, I woke up in a pretty bad mood. I was sort of mad at mom because I woke up around 4 and really wanted her to rock me for the rest of the night, but she shoved me back in my crib after about 5 minutes and made me go back to sleep on my own. This morning, once I had a full belly and a clear mind, I decided to forgive her for her mistake. I told her this in a half hour dialogue I worked up this morning and recited while sitting on the fireplace. Mom said she has never seen me so chatty. After this, I thought I should find some new ways to occupy my time, so I hit the half bath and spent some time lifting and dropping the toilet seat. When mom found me, so told me it was a bad idea and sort of dirty, although I am not sure why, and put me back in the living room. At this time, I spotted the leaves surrounding the lamps, I can’t believe I had never noticed them before, so I snagged one off the lamp and started eating it. Much to my chagrin, mom took that away from me as well. I sort of felt at this time that I was running out of options, so I headed out to explore our vast home, at which time I stumbled across mom’s curio cabinet. Let me tell you dad, there is some cool stuff in there, and right as I was getting ready to open the door to explore it’s many wonders, mom jumped in and gave me the big N.O. Seriously, what’s a boy to do? I was pretty bummed at this point as my quest for new fun had been seriously snuffed out. So, I spent a half hour pondering and attempting to open the locked cabinet under the kitchen sink. Then I had another brilliant idea, so I charged off to have myself a good climb on the stairs, only to find that mom had already blocked them. On my way back to my favorite cabinet, I attempted to climb in the cabinet mom keeps her purses in, but she told me no again and set me back in the living room, where I headed after another bundle of fun, the speaker cord. Just as I was getting ready to bite down, mom snagged it away and picked me up yet again. This time she deposited me by my refrigerator magnets. Feeling quite depressed, I grabbed my fridge farm tight and swayed to it’s comforting music, singing along with old mcdonald. Mom found this to be quite funny. How is that for cruel? Laughing at a man when he is down. Well, now I am off to play the guitar and see if it can’t heighten my spirits. I love you, Dad.

Asher

Andrea and I got married young and decided to have kids early – just a few years of marriage. It has been awesome, and God has blessed us with two wonderful children – I wouldn’t want it any other way.

In the past 4 years, we have not made an effort to find time for each other – until this year. I decided that, without question, we would go out on a date – just the two of us – with no ulterior motive (i.e. running to the grocery or doing errands), with the intent to do it weekly. So far, we’ve managed to do that with the help of my parents, Andrea’s mom and sister (thank you all!). It has been absolutely wonderful to rediscover each other through dating (without all the awkwardness of actually dating).

We’ve gone to movies, out to dinner, stayed home and caught up on TiVo, sat out on the deck – and it all has been waaaay overdue. Don’t get me wrong, I love my kids and I love spending one-on-one time with them, but my marriage has to come first sometimes…otherwise it will all go to hell.

So as I spend the next 4 days on business in New York, I look forward to another date night at the close of this week. For all you marrieds out there, I’m curious to know how often you and your significant other go out on a date. For those that haven’t been out on a date in a while – plan to have one soon!