Shortly after I turned 20, I was lucky enough to “lock in” the girl of my dreams. As two newly weds under the legal drinking age, we couldn’t rent a car so that really limited where we could go, so we went to Gatlinburg, stayed in the mountains and tried to figure out if we were crazy, stupid, ambitions, smart (or all of the above) for getting married so early.

Fast forward 7 years and two kids later, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

There is a theory out there that after 7 years people tend to re-evaluate their relationship. I’m pretty sure that number has shrunk a bit, but just go with me for a bit….

Andrea and I have not had extended time away, just the two of us, since our honeymoon 7 years ago. I feel we do a pretty good job finding time for ourselves, but going away, for more than a few days, without the kids, was long overdue. We did a lot of re-evaluation this week and came to the same conclusion – we are two very lucky people who love each other now more than we did when we first got married.

I don’t pretend to know everything there is to know about marriage or parenting; heck, most of the time I’m learning from mistakes – but at least I learn and progress. It took me 7 years to realize how important it was to get away with my bride. We both love our kids, and missed them while away, but we also have missed each other a lot the past 7 years.

I don’t plan on making that mistake again.

When was the last time you went away with just your signification other?

I am now in the the 2nd week of a 3 week stint away from home.  Last week had me in Vegas on business.  This week I’m in Florida enjoying a second honeymoon with my bride (no kids) and next week, I’ll be back in Vegas on business.

On Saturday, we drove to ATL to visit Andy.  We spent both Saturday and Sunday with him, and took off for Florida early Monday morning.  On our way out of Atlanta, an SUV ran a red light and I subsequently ran into him – hard.  We t-boned the drivers side of the car so bad that both windows blew out and a firetruck had to cut him out of the car.  Andrea and I are ok (both a little sore in the back and neck region), but our vehicle was still drivable, so we continued on our way.

It is pretty evident that we can’t have a simple vacation.  Last year, it was Asher’s birth.  This year, a freaking car accident on our way to the beach.  Oh well, at least we keep things exciting…

On our way to FLA, we were able to connect with Clayton Bell, a church planter that we connected with through Asher’s birth.  It was so great to finally “meet” Clayton in person and I’m excited for him and his ministry at TNLC.

The last few hours of the drive to our destination here on Fort Myers Beach finally started to feel like vacation.  After a quick stop at WalMart for groceries, we arrived at the condo and settled in.  The photo below was taken during sunset on Tuesday.  It was great to just be able to sit on the beach and talk.  We both were able to read books, nap and get up and walk whenever we wanted – something we haven’t been able to do for a very long time as parents of young kids.

Today it is rainy, so a trip to the outlet mall is in order.  It looks like the weather should clear up tomorrow so we’ll be back on the beach in no time!

My wife and sister-in-law are the same way. They all have that water gene. My wife was close to mastering wakeboarding, wakesurfing, and will have sky skiing down next.

This past weekend, I got to watch the Heffelfinger-water-gene come out in my beautiful little niece, Lex. Take a look at some rockstar edits of Dad and his little girl wakeboarding.

As many of you could tell by the several hundred photos I posted via twitter while away, we enjoyed our vacation.  I’m so thankful we are fortunate enough to take a vacation this year – especially in light of recent statistics stating a large percentage of American’s aren’t planning on taking any vacation this year.

During my vacation time, I do a lot of thinking an reflecting.  Here are 5 of the many things I learned while on vacation this year.

1 – Thank God For Mini-Vans
We were in the car for over 50 hours total (including some time in ATL and some time in Key West driving around).  That’s a crazy amount of time!  However, it really didn’t feel that long.  The van provided plenty of room, did great on gas mileage and the DVD system was a life saver a time or two.  I know I drop a couple of cool points with that one, but I’m ok with it – vans are great for traveling with kids.

2 – Waterproof Cameras Are A Must
We bought this camera last year and it has been absolutely awesome for us.  No need to stress our or worry about destroying your camera on the beach or at the pool any longer.  As someone who loves taking photos, bringing my DSLR to the beach is not something I’m too interested in.  Having this bad boy made it easier for me to settle in and relax while grabbing great shots.

3 – iPhones Are Life Savers
We did not have wifi on the island, so when I needed to check back in on the real world, we had to use my iPhone’s data connection.  However, I was able to “tether” my unlocked and jailbroken iPhone and use it as a modem for my laptop.  This was great when needing to type long emails for work.  It also gave us the ability to fire up the laptop and hit the interwebs while cruising on the Florida Turnpike.  We used it to check the weather as we were driving to Key West and home.  It was used to check traffic before we got stuck in the middle of it and it allowed me to check into work without having to fully check into work.  This was the first vacation I’ve had where I didn’t feel I was working most of the day.  Even my underwriter at work commented on how she was surprised I wasn’t as involved as I usually am while on vacation.  (I guess your advise to TAKE A FREAKING VACATION AND NOT WORK SO MUCH finally sunk in, Jennifer.)

4 – Life Comes Down “Who Ya Know”
Social networking it a phrase that is getting tossed around a lot lately.  Its actually a rather old phenomenon that has burst open with the new social mediums we have these days in twitter and facebook.  I’m a big believer in networking, whether through old-school styles or through new-school technology.  Its how I got my job, its how I’ve found houses, its how I’ve been able to enjoy a lot in life.  Vacationing is a big part of that as well.  Our stay on Sunset Key would have cost us over $30,000 for a the week!  THIRTY THOUSAND FREAKING DOLLARS – just for the home rental! I say WOULD because we were able to stay there for FREE.  Why?  Networking.  Same thing with Hilton Head and last year’s Private Party at a Waterpark.  Knowing the right people, and CULTIVATING those relationships is so important in so many different ways.

5 – I Love My Family
No, this isn’t a thing I recently learned on this trip (obviously), but there was an element that really struck me this time around.  I love my job.  I don’t hide it at all and everyone I work with knows I really do love it.  But at the end of the day, it is only a job.  I think I’ve cheated my family out of a lot of good vacation time – time away from the normal, everyday life – time to create memories together.  I bring work with me everywhere I go and have often put my family to the side.  Now my wife understands that sometimes work must come first – but it can’t come first all the time.  This trip, along with last year’s events, have really forced me to grow up as a father/husband and work had at finding a balance in life.

The Beach on a clear day.

The Beach as a storm rolls in.

I’ll post more photos in the next few days.  Catching up at work and home after being away for so long has made life a little crazy around here!

Click here to watch the video all you RSS folks.

I love you Asher and I am so very proud of you!

This morning we were able to connect with a family friend for breakfast before we took off. Photo below is of Jade enjoying their beautiful home.

Be sure to stop in tomorrow as more updates will follow, along with a Video Tour if the island!

Later today we embark on one hell of a road trip! I actually hate driving, but for several reasons, driving to the the extreme south of Florida made more sense – both from a fiscal standpoint and from a logic standpoint given all the crap we’ll have to haul with a 3 and 1 year-old.

We’ll make the first leg this afternoon, arriving in ATL in the evening. We’ll have breakfast with some family friends in Atlanta Friday morning and then make the 800+ mile drive to Sunset Key. This will be the first real road test of our new mini-van, so we’ll see how that goes.

Be sure to check my twitter feed for photos and short updates during our travels today and tomorrow.  Saturday I’ll be sure to give you all a great tour of the island – which I know will make you all jealous!  I’ll also be doing some video broadcasting from my phone as well.  Needless to say, the next few days will be extremely active here at cjmills.me.

Please keep us all on your prayers as we travel.

Both of my kids really enjoyed eating sand on their first trip to the beach.

Enjoying time with Grandma.

Jadyn was able to fly a kite for the first time.

Here is said kite.

Asher enjoying some pool with time Aunt Cassandra.

Jadyn lovin on mommy.

Gotta love the white sand of Sanibel Island.

Ash lookin a little dazed and confused.

Andrea and the kids made it back safely from their time away in Florida.  I was met by a sprinting, crazy-haired 3-year-old in the baggage claim area of the airport who jumped into my arms and whispered “I missed you, Daddy!” into my ear.  It was a moment made for the big screen!  Its funny how quickly both kids made themselves at home.  Andrea was crazy tired, as were the kids, which meant Saturday night was a short evening.  Today has been a true Lazy Sunday.  Its raining like crazy around here and extremely cold.  None of us have the energy to do anything but nothing (if that makes sense).  Check back here later for some video of Jadyn swimming all on her own!

This weekend was particularly fun because I got to watch Jadyn experience life with her cousins.  She is blessed to have a wonderful older cousin (first photo) that acted as her big sister while taking her on all the little kid rides that we couldn’t (she also rode all the other “grown up” rides that I would NEVER EVER EVER get on).  Jadyn is equally blessed to have a crazy, fun-loving cousin (last photo) who acts as her partner in crime as they both ran around kiddie land with wide open eyes screaming, “WANNA GO ON THIS RIDE NEXT?!?!” back and forth to each other.

It was a jammed packed weekend of fun and while I can’t speak for everyone, it was a trip my family needed for sure!

Jade has been with Andrea’s family this week in Florida.  This is the first time we’ve been away from Jadyn for more than a weekend or so.  While it was good for us to spend a lot of time with Asher this week, we are both growing incredibly tired and worn out.  I know having Jadyn back in our house will not make it easier on us, but it will make life more enjoyable again.  Crazy how kids can have such an impact on the attitudes of parents.

I’m sure Jadyn’s older cousins are taking care of her, though – right Jarin and Alexis?!

Special thanks to Cassandra for sending me photos while stealing internet from another condo unit – atta girl!

The reality of the situation didn’t hit me until this morning when Asher’s Doctor in Charleston called at 6:30 in the morning to give us an update. The update wasn’t really an update at all. Instead, it was simply confirming what we already knew – Asher was a premy with serious lung and breathing issues. Worry started to set in. Questions of “what if” started to fill my mind without cease. I did a pretty good job of seeming “put together” and “in control” because, after all, I am the Man of the house, right? At one point, I nearly broke down as Andy handed me the phone to speak with his Aunt who I’ve gotten to know over the past few vacations to Atlanta/Hilton Head. After asking how we were doing, she quickly stated that she would do whatever we needed her to do to help out and that she loves us. It didn’t matter that I wasn’t her nephew, or that I wasn’t related to her at all. All that mattered was that my family was in need. This is only one of the many stories of family and friends stepping up to the plate to pinch hit for us in a time of need. When things slow down, I will post all of the cool stories and connections we have made and how things like twitter and this blog allowed for quick information flow.

The photo below is what I saw as I walked into by bedroom tonight (obviously I had to Photoshop the image of Asher I saw I as looked out into the moonlit ocean into the photo I took, but you get the idea). For the first time in the last 24 hours, I felt peace. It didn’t last too long, but just long enough to remind me that there is a greater plan for all of this and that all I can do is lead my wife and daughter into the next chapter of the story we call Asher James Mills.

Thank you to all for your continued support and prayer. Pray for our travels tomorrow and that Asher continues to fight for an early return home. I have a feeling that things will feel a lot better when we are with him tomorrow.